tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65203463966108844322024-03-06T06:10:08.468+03:00HAHAHAHAHAH INDUSTRYUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger434125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-60217316314268395792013-06-29T23:50:00.001+03:002013-06-29T23:51:22.465+03:00USHAURI<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Binti 1 alienda kupeleka malalamiko kwa MCHUNGAJI feki ili kupata ushauri.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BINTI akaanza: Kuna kijana ambaye sitamsahau kwa aliyonifanyia.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHUNGAJI: Alikufanyia nini?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BINTI: Akashindwa kusema, akanyamaza!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHUNGAJI: Alikufanya hivi? (akamshika chuchu).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BINTI: Hapana.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHUNGAJI: Au alikufanya hivi (akaanza kumla denda).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BINTI: Alifanya zaidi ya hivyo.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHUNGAJI: Au hivi? (akamvua sketi, kisha chupi).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BINTI: Inaelekeana na hivyo.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHUNGAJI: Aaah! kumbe hivi (akaanza ku...sex..).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BINTI: Oooh..oooh..mmmmh ..aaaah, sii..iih! hivyo hivyo ..yaani Mpaka akaniambukiza UKIMWI!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHUNGAJI: WHAAAAAT? Kwisha kazi!!!</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-59302061334322144712013-06-29T23:44:00.000+03:002013-06-29T23:44:09.901+03:00KITASA<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MTOTO: baba kuna tofauti gani kati ya kilichopo katikati ya mapaja ya mama na ya kwako?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">BABA: kwa mama yako kuna geti la kuingilia PARADISO na kwangu kuna ufunguo wa kufungulia hilo gate, mtoto akamuuliza ulimpa mtu yoyote funguo?, baba akajibu hapana kwa nini, mtoto akajibu badili kitasa yule jirani yetu atakuwa amechongesha funguo, ukiondoka huwa anakuja kufungua, Akifungua mama anapga kelele sana itakuwa funguo yake kubwa, baba oohooo!</span><br />
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-88816306417973081012013-06-29T22:23:00.003+03:002013-06-29T22:23:44.789+03:00UPADRI<br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Wanaume (6) wanajaribiwa kuwa mapadri,</span></div>
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Mbele yao akasimamishwa Mtoto wakike akavua nguo akabaki mtupu yaani uchi, Mmoja kati ya wale (6) akasimamisha mboo akaambiwa toka wewe hufai, wakabaki (5) Ikatupwa kalamu chini, Yule binti akaambiwa aiokote akiwa amewapa mgongo watahiniwa, ile kuinama tu wote wakasimamisha mboo, Wakaambiwa heri ya yulle mtombaji kuliko nyie wafiraji ondokeni hamufai kuchunga kondoo wa bwana...!</div>
</span>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-85975311764052478302013-06-23T21:20:00.002+03:002013-06-23T21:20:29.088+03:00WAZO LA LEO<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Hata uwahi vipi kufika Kanisani. Hauwezi kukaa kwenye kiti cha mchungaji!</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-50477056327390270502013-06-23T17:38:00.000+03:002013-06-23T17:45:50.720+03:00WABUNGE<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJFoL6CCi22GvatuwLgAivjYzlpH16eaaPbQsCmCd-Ept2YfGkbJpw1muiQkVQHNZ0yS0kHVoDBl6Fy9iE0kABDbECuxPBIkqr2v30CqvrVSH2klqRwsFtRxjIXRN1b-CrtlIwqtDlA0jc/s1600/RADIO.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJFoL6CCi22GvatuwLgAivjYzlpH16eaaPbQsCmCd-Ept2YfGkbJpw1muiQkVQHNZ0yS0kHVoDBl6Fy9iE0kABDbECuxPBIkqr2v30CqvrVSH2klqRwsFtRxjIXRN1b-CrtlIwqtDlA0jc/s1600/RADIO.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">MTOTO: Baba hivi hiyo Redio ina spika?</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">BABA: Ndio mwanangu inayo Spika</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">MTOTO: Kama inayo spika, mbona haina Wabunge? Wako wapi?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">BABA: Swali gumu Mwanangu..ngoja nisome Mwongozo..!!!</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-36989411685941699762013-06-21T15:43:00.001+03:002013-06-21T15:52:50.308+03:00DIRTY MIND<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQwWpL8ubN5CGCpNVcf7vnqWaS1i3cbhd8MMkuQ4LktQlrbiZ7YzGHmyck2KfAFzHmAAglwMmj-nHH7jmqUOriEOV3u-YEnzHzqni2gJDYQia-mlJy_60M2rnfACm6bCVJE7VwmF-MSPWk/s1600/life-funnier-with-dirty-mind-best-demotivational-posters.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQwWpL8ubN5CGCpNVcf7vnqWaS1i3cbhd8MMkuQ4LktQlrbiZ7YzGHmyck2KfAFzHmAAglwMmj-nHH7jmqUOriEOV3u-YEnzHzqni2gJDYQia-mlJy_60M2rnfACm6bCVJE7VwmF-MSPWk/s1600/life-funnier-with-dirty-mind-best-demotivational-posters.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Hebu jaribu kujaza herufi zinazokosekana: KUM_, CHUP_, UBO__ SHAHA__, UCH_, MATA__, MKUND_ </span></div>
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">hhaa! Mbona umejaza upuuzi unawaza ngono tu? Ilibidi ujaze KUMI,CHUPA,UBOVU,SHAHADA,UCHU,MATAMANIO,MKUNDE. Maneno haya yanaunda maana hii:CHUPA KUMI ZA BIA ZAMNYIMA SHAHADA MWENYE MATAMANIO NA UCHU KAMA KIPEPEO.</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-25678089756978061972013-06-21T14:50:00.003+03:002013-06-21T14:50:43.370+03:00VAGINA JOKES<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Q: Why is a vagina just like the weather? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: When it's wet, it's time to go inside </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do the Mafia and a pussy have in common?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> A: One slip of the tongue, and you're in deep shit. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Why do women have vaginas?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: So that men will speak to them! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What does a blonde and a tampon have in common? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: They are both stuck up cunts! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do homosexuals and mice have in common? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: They both hate pussy! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What did the penis say to the vagina? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Don't make me cum in there. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Why is a woman's pussy like a public restroom? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: They both feel good, but you wonder who has been there before you! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do you call a policewoman who shaves her pubes? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Cuntstubble. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do you call the space between the vagina and the arsehole? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: The chinrest! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Why do blondes wear tampons? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Because crabs like bungee jumping too! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do you call the useless flesh that surrounds a vagina?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> A: The woman! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What’s the the definition of a vagina? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: The box a penis cums in. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do you call a Roman soldier with a smile on his face and a piece of hair between his two front teeth? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: A GLAD-HE-ATE-HER </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do pimps and dogs have in common? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: They both ate pussy </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the definition of a tongue-twister? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: A spiral pussy! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the difference between eating pussy and driving in a snowstorm? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: When you eat pussy, you can always see the arsehole in front of you! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do you get if you stuff your hand up a gypsy's cunt when she is on her period? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Your palm Red! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What is the irritating part around a blonde's pussy? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: The other guys waiting their turn! Girl "I wear heels bigger than your dick!" Guy: "I take shits fresher than your pussy." </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: How do you know if you have an overbite? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: If your eating pussy and it tastes like shit! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What’s the difference between parsley and pussy? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Nobody eats parsley. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What is 6.9? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: a great number ruined by a period </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: How do you know when your husband eats too much pussy? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: When he goes to the dentist to get a haircut! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the smallest hotel known to man? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: A pussy. Because you leave your bags outside! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the difference between a clit and a mobile phone? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Nothing, every cunt's got one! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the difference between a pussy and a cunt? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: A pussy is sweet, juicy, succulent, warm, fun and a useful thing. The cunt is the thing that owns it! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What tastes good on pizza but not on pussy? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Crust! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What do you call that patch of hair between an old ladys tits? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Her snatch.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What is a vagina?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> A: The box a penis comes in.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Q: What if the Pilgrims had killed bobcats instead of turkeys? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: We’d be eating pussy every Thanksgiving.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the difference between parsley and pussy? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Nobody eats parsley!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Q: Why do women have two holes. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: So that when they are drunk, you can carry them like a six pack! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Why is a Brazilian wax called the cabin strip?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> A: Because it has a cockpit at one end of it </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Did you hear about the blind gynecologist? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: He could read lips! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Where are you from? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: A Vagina </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What did the blind man say when he passed the fish market? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: Good morning ladies. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: Why are pussy pubic hairs curly? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: You would poke your eye out if it were straight! </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Q: What's the difference between a bowling ball and a pussy? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A: You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball! Boy: </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> S<b>ubmissons by: d-jdrywall, latrust, t-bone216, jillwestergren, tiviqueen, davidrayd, colinmorra, tablazek23, tjkoolhockey, jjholderfield, nelson.mike191971 </b></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Source: <a href="http://www.jokes4us.com/dirtyjokes/vaginajokes.html">http://www.jokes4us.com/dirtyjokes/vaginajokes.html</a></span></b></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-21762753476191112902013-06-20T20:23:00.000+03:002013-06-20T20:23:44.488+03:00NIPO KAMILI<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhx0A-UdENJIgPP90TLjDfmaMPlTZ9jKd_MeCc8nvgLJbQlLE5IfOvaDPlk5xqhEW2gp5UQBHE16TY9sPSwJ4o7Y_yPNJabhjINx58vJ2LmhtuiZTWbuI0vftS5cZO-W090UV5lKgNWy1XL/s1600/food.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="144" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhx0A-UdENJIgPP90TLjDfmaMPlTZ9jKd_MeCc8nvgLJbQlLE5IfOvaDPlk5xqhEW2gp5UQBHE16TY9sPSwJ4o7Y_yPNJabhjINx58vJ2LmhtuiZTWbuI0vftS5cZO-W090UV5lKgNWy1XL/s200/food.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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Kijana alikutwa na BIBLE na Kondomu<br />
<a name='more'></a> mfukoni akaulizwa mbona unatembea navyo?Akajibu "Shetani na kuma hawaaminiki wanaweza kutokea wakati wo wote"! Akitokea shetani nina BIBLE. Ikitokea kuma nina KONDOM.Nipo kamili mwanangu.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-91729547106162577652013-06-20T19:31:00.004+03:002013-06-20T19:31:36.895+03:00MCHAGA KWA KUPENDA HELA<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9zbyWcQ4aGWKrwucCXZ8tIwW-tUCPAk3JDE0Q4JpoeE-1UOXfG-F_rPsBUYpuTKN4fopzsDimqGLZxD38jI__8z1W1VNxb0_56Ict0vifJATE06zS5yiCK1YDLPevq2ahmq8O5rO_ZdUN/s1600/12.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9zbyWcQ4aGWKrwucCXZ8tIwW-tUCPAk3JDE0Q4JpoeE-1UOXfG-F_rPsBUYpuTKN4fopzsDimqGLZxD38jI__8z1W1VNxb0_56Ict0vifJATE06zS5yiCK1YDLPevq2ahmq8O5rO_ZdUN/s1600/12.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Basi lilipata ajali likazama kwenye mto<a name='more'></a>, abiria wakaanza kujikomboa kwa kuogelea. Kwa bahati nzuri MCHAGA mmoja akajitahidi na kujiokoa. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Kufika nchi kavu. </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">MCHAGA akavua nguo na kutaka kujitupa tena mtoni wa2 wakamshika na kumuuliza kulikoni! </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Akajibu nataka kumtafuta KONDA hajanirudishia chenchi yangu.</span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-61448213459949900292013-06-20T16:14:00.003+03:002013-06-20T16:14:56.431+03:00WAZO LA LEO<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYbk5mxEyayz6LV-Zylv64rIk7HRbhYIXF7le7gKCM1DJwPRnY98tC1C9JCI2OMbaMyEodMYNd3h1-zfVFcNBfYae4yUy5ai0stLsbnMKxLrnwGYGl8tyXEEpV8eCCr8ZfJ2GukLR-m_Ha/s1600/cm+kufuri.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYbk5mxEyayz6LV-Zylv64rIk7HRbhYIXF7le7gKCM1DJwPRnY98tC1C9JCI2OMbaMyEodMYNd3h1-zfVFcNBfYae4yUy5ai0stLsbnMKxLrnwGYGl8tyXEEpV8eCCr8ZfJ2GukLR-m_Ha/s200/cm+kufuri.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Hata uwe na heshima kiasi gani. Kamwe hauwezi ukajisalimia mwenyewe.</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-18739127685162096262013-06-20T16:06:00.001+03:002013-06-20T16:06:20.775+03:00ACHENI UTANI<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikPuKahDZ-16-bSOM2avzY2nKaRiB4J6qCBJgoLNgtaVakXKI3TAhxNbmcYVhLjByAXhEax8Cb86J3WeR58L7pQp1RoJZA_nIU0TC58uZPQxdxrTigkfGFk9IZ1GEzWKAS2NpfDyuls73L/s1600/wanafunzi.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikPuKahDZ-16-bSOM2avzY2nKaRiB4J6qCBJgoLNgtaVakXKI3TAhxNbmcYVhLjByAXhEax8Cb86J3WeR58L7pQp1RoJZA_nIU0TC58uZPQxdxrTigkfGFk9IZ1GEzWKAS2NpfDyuls73L/s200/wanafunzi.jpg" width="160" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">ACHENI UTANI HATA KAMA MISHAHARA MIDOGO.Ona huu mtihani wa terminal nimeunasa shule moja</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1.Rais wa Sasa wa Tanzania ni Kikwe__</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A)ta (b)te (c)ti (d)to (e)tu</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2.Alye fanya Tanganyka iwe huru ni Nyere__ </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">a)ra (b)re (c)ri (d)ro (e)ru.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">3.Mlima mrefu kuliko yote Afrika ni Kilima___ro</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">a)nja (b) nje (c)nji (d)njo (e)nju.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">TAFAKARI</span>.<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-35394532248633514262013-05-18T15:19:00.001+03:002013-05-18T15:19:53.730+03:00PADRI<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYNWx9GRHepCY1IBgzLt9TjSxrFu7jw3llqmgMPiCP4XKSDqdhuaD1SAYfsr2KaPS0vZieyXVZWASaCep5nSHg4dA1FkK0137gEOJulbXi7qGAylAjHGKutvcf9XtKMgtWL73uV4LHuJhz/s1600/priest_clip_art_25009.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYNWx9GRHepCY1IBgzLt9TjSxrFu7jw3llqmgMPiCP4XKSDqdhuaD1SAYfsr2KaPS0vZieyXVZWASaCep5nSHg4dA1FkK0137gEOJulbXi7qGAylAjHGKutvcf9XtKMgtWL73uV4LHuJhz/s200/priest_clip_art_25009.jpg" width="171" /></a></div>
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Padri mmoja fuska alitoka kwenda kuzini na Sista chini ya mti<br />
<a name='more'></a> kumbe juu ya mti kuna teja amejificha anavuta bangi, basi baada ya kumaliza uzinzi wao Sista akamuuliza Padri kama ametumia kondomu. Padri akasema hapana, Sista akasema vipi nitapata mimba? Padri akasema hiyo tumuachie aliye juu. Yule teja akaruka chini akawaambia nyie kuma nini? kutombana mtombane nyie halafu mimba mniachie mimi? Nyie wasenge kweli.</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-81936492945646584872013-05-18T15:08:00.005+03:002013-05-18T15:08:40.909+03:00NDOA YA SHOGA<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA6q0S6ksnndaFaCXbuF3XQNlKgp5PWtKkbU0Ad7nNPcSDl129wxtbkuXn5f0PtehmubIreXU4r_4X7RC2-5QqHafmF8CG1Zvh9KWdH_7f16cl67fBxBLRCRWCYSqZI-6B83LRRJY84w6Z/s1600/SHOGA.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiA6q0S6ksnndaFaCXbuF3XQNlKgp5PWtKkbU0Ad7nNPcSDl129wxtbkuXn5f0PtehmubIreXU4r_4X7RC2-5QqHafmF8CG1Zvh9KWdH_7f16cl67fBxBLRCRWCYSqZI-6B83LRRJY84w6Z/s1600/SHOGA.jpg" /></a></div>
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Mchungaji mmoja baada ya kuwafungisha ndoa "mashoga" wawili<br />
<a name='more'></a> alipata wakati mgumu kutamka kuwa "sasa ninyi ni MKE na MUME" lakini atafanyaje wakati wote ni wanaume? Mchungaji akapiga moyo konde na kusema "tangu sasa ninyi ni MAN UNITED."</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-82403214759047407302013-05-01T14:53:00.001+03:002013-05-01T14:53:30.874+03:00MAASAI<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2VI9uxwUzPOCFpwaZ93r7P826E_771vgdL_Z0C2jnrMgguMf58cbdLTQhp7t4Bx55tNhYt19JTzLY8XG7uZJ06EAJrkdcRZb4cwCE4T3xF_NYac-V84n4-NHPTrHF9RKnkenSTNNpwTNH/s1600/masai.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2VI9uxwUzPOCFpwaZ93r7P826E_771vgdL_Z0C2jnrMgguMf58cbdLTQhp7t4Bx55tNhYt19JTzLY8XG7uZJ06EAJrkdcRZb4cwCE4T3xF_NYac-V84n4-NHPTrHF9RKnkenSTNNpwTNH/s320/masai.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Masai kapewa penzi baada ya kukojoa akatulia tulii pale juu kwa zaidi ya dakika 5. <br />
<a name='more'></a>Malaya akamwambia "Mbona huondoki si ushakojoa?" Masai akajibu "namalisia kunya."</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-80989481834710487082013-04-19T19:00:00.000+03:002013-04-19T19:00:37.065+03:00SHOGA<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvJsYF-1WPjUkH_Y1YHcaH_1dBv9Rh39Pp6DJHGeofMJ7_BzqiX9nZL-3MJLdR_chCVlsfy6SEjmeAmmum-N24bPTdWJ3FvZkoFUNR4pBedSSJTjbfLcjuzqj85JgoedowmNIzuf5y1cxd/s1600/mike.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvJsYF-1WPjUkH_Y1YHcaH_1dBv9Rh39Pp6DJHGeofMJ7_BzqiX9nZL-3MJLdR_chCVlsfy6SEjmeAmmum-N24bPTdWJ3FvZkoFUNR4pBedSSJTjbfLcjuzqj85JgoedowmNIzuf5y1cxd/s200/mike.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>
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Katika harusi shoga kajichanganya na wanawake chumbani wakawa wanajifusha udi.<br />
<a name='more'></a>Yule msenge naye akachukua kanga akajifunika katika kuchuchumaa ajifushe udi, mapumbu si yakagusa kitezo ghafla akpiga kelele "yalaaa". Wakamuuliza vipi tena? akajibu kwa mashauzi SI HILI JISIMI LIMEGUSA MOTO!</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-44889821024594060842013-04-19T18:53:00.002+03:002013-04-19T18:53:37.181+03:00ETI NI KWELI?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvJsYF-1WPjUkH_Y1YHcaH_1dBv9Rh39Pp6DJHGeofMJ7_BzqiX9nZL-3MJLdR_chCVlsfy6SEjmeAmmum-N24bPTdWJ3FvZkoFUNR4pBedSSJTjbfLcjuzqj85JgoedowmNIzuf5y1cxd/s1600/mike.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvJsYF-1WPjUkH_Y1YHcaH_1dBv9Rh39Pp6DJHGeofMJ7_BzqiX9nZL-3MJLdR_chCVlsfy6SEjmeAmmum-N24bPTdWJ3FvZkoFUNR4pBedSSJTjbfLcjuzqj85JgoedowmNIzuf5y1cxd/s200/mike.jpg" width="150" /></a></div>
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Mmmmmh!!! Watu wanakusema sana nimeshindwa kuvumilia bora nikuambie tu kama ukinuna poa. <br />
<a name='more'></a>Eti wanasema 'ukinya' unatuna kama golikipa. Eti ni kweli?</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-13421369032534247892013-04-19T18:42:00.001+03:002013-04-19T18:42:10.884+03:00JOHN<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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John ni chizi katika hospitali ya vichaa kwa muda wa miaka 7.<br />
<a name='more'></a> Alipotaka kutoroka alifanya zoezi la kuruka geti kwa miezi 5, siku ya kutoroka aliaga marafiki zake na kuondoka lakini ghafla akarudi akiwa mnyonge wenzake wakamuuliza mbona umerudi? John akajibu nimekuta geti lipo wazi nikashindwa kuruka. </div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-69933639157746022012013-03-30T11:56:00.000+03:002013-03-30T11:56:57.029+03:00NANI MJANJA?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK015PnlMaSGFSqViTG8zTVPAvJ8m0h5TghKozgkGQ-u_RLamu4S-cIE6suRbjHFWVIPzyQnQ8dxiS7l3Ub54Xd-T7X0sIEFNE6xZ47hc2SILLLrqfGAPlr6sfcqBLJbk1U8GSdeAmjBMj/s1600/debtconsolidation1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="260" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK015PnlMaSGFSqViTG8zTVPAvJ8m0h5TghKozgkGQ-u_RLamu4S-cIE6suRbjHFWVIPzyQnQ8dxiS7l3Ub54Xd-T7X0sIEFNE6xZ47hc2SILLLrqfGAPlr6sfcqBLJbk1U8GSdeAmjBMj/s320/debtconsolidation1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mchaga alimkopesha </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Mpare Pesa,</span><br />
<a name='more'></a><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> shahidi akiwa Msambaa,muda wa kulipa </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">ulipofika Mpare kwa Ubahili akaamua kujiua ili asilipe.Kuona hivyo Mchaga kwa kupenda Pesa nae </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">akajiua ili akamdai Mpare hukohuko. Msambaa:"Tate </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">nanee!Aloo lazima nikashuhudie ugomvi".Kwa kupenda </span><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">umbea nae akajiua ili akashuhudie ugomvi.Nani Mjanja.</span></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-55175938774591543232013-03-29T21:13:00.001+03:002013-03-30T02:46:20.477+03:00SAMAKI<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Muuza samaki na mteja..........</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Mteja: "Samaki bei gani?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Muuzaji: "shilingi 5000"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Mteja: "Mwisho?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Muuzaji: "Mkiani"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Mteja: "Mbona samaki mwenyewe kalegMuuza samaki na mteja..........</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Mteja: "Samaki bei gani?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Muuzaji: "shilingi 5000"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Mteja: "Mwisho?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Muuzaji: "Mkiani"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Mteja: "Mbona samaki mwenyewe kalegea?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Muuzaji: "Labda alikua shoga baharini....."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Muuzaji: "Labda alikua shoga baharini....."</span></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-1314341109149974122013-03-29T21:07:00.001+03:002013-03-29T21:07:16.985+03:00MAHARI<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Jamaa aliposa,</span></div>
<a name='more'></a> akaambiwa mahari milion 5, akasema kwa mshangao : HEE! MILIONI 5? WAKATI HAPO KWA JIRANI NIMEAMBIWA LAKI 2 TU TENA ANA MIMBA KABISA.<br /></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-71468866484767746972013-03-29T16:09:00.002+03:002013-03-29T16:09:19.142+03:00I CONTROLLED MYSELF<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">1) I stopped a woman being raped last night</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Really? How did you do that?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> I controlled myself. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">2) She threw the pepper pot in my face, my lord.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> And what did you do?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> I sneezed, of course, you blithering old fool!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">3) Why did you bite your mother-in-law?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> The wife was always throwing her in my teeth</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br />4) Have you seen a policeman about?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> No! .....</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Good, Give us your handbag!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">5) Lady barrister "And what is your age?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Lady witness "About the same as yours ...?"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">6) "Please give me some money." pleaded the begger "All i have in the world is this gun."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">7) You wont find a tax at this time of night</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Thank god for that now I can cross the road</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">8) Can a man marry his own sister?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Of course not!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> Yes he can if he's a person!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">9) "I follow the medical profession." said the witness </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> "Are you a doctor?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> "No! an undertaker."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">10)Can you describe the man who hit you? Asked the policeman.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;"> That's what i was doing when he hit me.</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: #b45f06;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Thanks ALIFYA HASSANALI</span></span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #b45f06;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">FOREST HILL SEC. SCHOOL </span></span></b></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-45379180824883472892013-03-29T15:39:00.001+03:002013-03-29T15:39:04.718+03:00LAUGHTER<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDAyDCACJy7k6bRFomS4wL-0nFB3PgNMYsp_IiTar6vOKmPez3UgA6DTLn3sDu5a2ontQmZkwAuP_kiMZxhGgqjWfvXKllxYdAHdHJuoJ_cbr4dCkgCCfrdSUlLzilLzHNaerlEihqAJxh/s1600/laughing-collage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDAyDCACJy7k6bRFomS4wL-0nFB3PgNMYsp_IiTar6vOKmPez3UgA6DTLn3sDu5a2ontQmZkwAuP_kiMZxhGgqjWfvXKllxYdAHdHJuoJ_cbr4dCkgCCfrdSUlLzilLzHNaerlEihqAJxh/s1600/laughing-collage.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">TOURIST: Are we lost? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">AFRICAN GUIDE: We are not lost. We are here. Trail lost</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">SON:Do you remember promising me twenty shilings if i get a good report this term?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">FATHER: Yes, of course i do</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">SON: Well, i have saved you the expense</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">PATIENT: I'm so nervous! This is my first operation</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">DOCTOR: I know how you feel. This is my first one too!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"Mummy, i dreamt about you last night," said a nine year old son</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"Oh what happened?" asked his mother</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"What do you mean what happened?" he asked indignantly.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">"You were there!"</span><br />
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<b><span style="color: #cc0000;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">Thanks UMEKULSUM Y. ZAVERY</span></span></b><br />
<b><span style="color: #cc0000;"><span style="font-family: Verdana,sans-serif;">ANDREA MWAKA SEC. SCHOOL (1990s)</span></span></b><br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-60777660111929411332013-03-28T20:23:00.000+03:002013-03-28T20:23:20.262+03:00TRAIN STATION<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Jamaa wawili walifika Stesheni.<br />
<a name='more'></a> Wakakuta Treni ndio kwanza inaondoka; wakaanza kuikimbiza, mmoja akafanikiwa kupanda akaondoka. Yule aliyebaki akaanza kucheka sana mpaka machozi yakamtoka. Watu wakamuuliza "Unacheka nini wakati umeachwa?" Akawajibu "Yule aliyepanda alikuwa ananisindikiza!"</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-44940952384858923182013-03-27T16:01:00.004+03:002013-03-27T16:01:52.915+03:00SUMMARIZING BEFORE EXAM.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6520346396610884432.post-37052388700391682492013-03-27T15:53:00.000+03:002013-03-27T15:53:03.668+03:00PANDE HIZO CHINA<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0